Michigan Journal

Issue date: 3/18/08 Section: News

Media Credit: Raechel Matyas Four panelists shared their experiences of being involved in interracial relationships last Friday at the University of Michigan-Dearborn's Conversation on Race.

Media Credit: Raechel Matyas After the initial open discussion, audience members were invited to converse in smaller groups with members of the panel.

An honest discussion about race in the 21st century took a new spin at the University of Michigan-Dearborn's Conversation on Race last Friday when it focused on interracial relationships.

Video and conversation revolved around the socially constructed ideology of race, and what it meant to work through relational situations where race was both a positive and negative factor.

UM-D communications student Ken Paylor acted as moderator between a panel and the audience.

A panel of both those involved in interracial relationships, and children of parents in interracial relationships, each shared their experiences.

UM-D Muslim student Faris Alami is married to a Presbyterian. He said his family was taken back by the initial fact that his wife is white, but open to the idea.

Keith Jason, who works for Eastern Michigan University, has been married to his black wife for two years. Serge Danielson-Francois, a librarian for Divine Child school is also interracially married. Both Jason and Danielson-Francois said family reactions became less and less of an issue. Danielson-Francois said his parents were more concerned with the fact that he was getting married than to who he was marrying.

The fourth panelist, Rebekah Dewberry, a UM-D faculty member, told a very different story.

"I believed that interracial relationships were wrong. I was raised that way," she said.

Dewberry said she and her family attended an all-white, Baptist church, and that when she found herself attracted to a black man, she was actually frightened. But, Dewberry said she was attracted to him because "he defied all the stereotypes of a black man."

Paylor asked the panelists what role differing religions played in their relationships.

"Religion is about you and God," said Alami. "It is not wrong to talk about things you don't know and understand, so you must be open about your beliefs from the start."

The audience questioned the panel about raising their children under a household that valued two different religions.

"It comes down to values of love, God and respect - no matter if they are taught through Muslim or Christian rituals," said Alami.

Jason, who does not have children yet, said he and his wife agreed that they would share both religions with their children. "We can't save them from being stereotyped, but we will teach them that they are beautiful because they are them," he said.

When the panel was asked about advice they would give anyone who is entering into an interracial relationship, their number one answer was communication.

"Marriage is a beautiful challenge, and also all about communication," said Jason.

"Do the talking up front, dig deeper. You usually mean the same thing but are just communicating it differently," added Alami.

"Definitely do not hide the fact, don't be afraid to love based on other's opinions," said Dewberry.

The second set of panelists identified themselves as biracial children. Each voiced their frustration with not knowing what racial "box" to check.

UM-D student Katrina Palmer, who is black and Filipino, said it came down to figuring out which of her ethnicities would be the advantage in the situation.

Paylor asked the panel if they would ever claim one race over the other. All of the members said that they found it hard to be accepted by either side, and that they were OK with being in the middle.

"I am objective in defining myself," said Terry Isaac, who has black and white parents. "I've learned to look past race. It is experiences that develop a person. I know the realities in race mattering, but I'm made an effort for it not to in my life."

All of the children admitted that they had been teased at various stages of their life.

"My parents apologized to me, and acknowledged the fact that I started out life in a more confusing way than others," said Carrie Smith. "But, they also taught me to be a strong person and I don't let it get to me."

"I get the best, and worst, of both worlds," said Isaac.

There will be a Chancellor's lecture series event Apr. 1 from 4:00 to 5:30 p.m. in the BorgWarner Auditorium on campus titled "Hate on the Internet." The guest speaker will be Jack Kay of UM-Flint.

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