How to avoid Christmas chaos when meeting the parents
These helpful tips will ensure that you avoid making a fool of yourself when meeting his or her family for the first time
Erin Marquis
Issue date: 12/4/07 Section: Features
- < prev Page 2 of 2
Do Your
Homework
Speak extensively with your boyfriend or girlfriend about sensitive areas in family history. If there have been divorces, recent layoffs or other tragic events, small talk can quickly become hairy. Find out the important details before hand so you don't embarrass or anger anyone.
Stay away from
politics, money and
religion
These are subjects where people feel very strongly. Shouting matches are born between new acquaintances and soon you are remembered as that awful liberal or conservative that's leading their precious son or daughter down the wrong path. If the mom or dad bring it up it's usually okay to engage, just don't argue! Agree to disagree, or bow out of the conversation. There's a lot to be said by simply keeping your mouth shut.
Don't swear
Practice a week ahead of the meeting. Most of us speak like a mix between a sailor and a truck stop waitress. Be respectful and use respectful language. Not doing so is a sure way to get relatives to quickly dislike you.
Help Out
The first thing out of your mouth when you make your way to the dining room or wherever the party is held at should be, "Is there anything I can do?" Their parents will be really impressed that you even asked. Remember that this day is just as stressful for them. If you pitch in to fill cocktail glasses or wash dishes, you will make a major impression.
You may screw it up. Then you have to worry about damage control, which should involve a lot of apologies. However, your hosts will mostly likely be gracious and give you a little leeway. After all, there must be some reason why their kid is with you.
If you follow this advice and use some common sense, you'll do great. Be yourself, but be the best part of yourself. You want a healthy relationship with your significant other's family so your feelings for each other can grow.
Homework
Speak extensively with your boyfriend or girlfriend about sensitive areas in family history. If there have been divorces, recent layoffs or other tragic events, small talk can quickly become hairy. Find out the important details before hand so you don't embarrass or anger anyone.
Stay away from
politics, money and
religion
These are subjects where people feel very strongly. Shouting matches are born between new acquaintances and soon you are remembered as that awful liberal or conservative that's leading their precious son or daughter down the wrong path. If the mom or dad bring it up it's usually okay to engage, just don't argue! Agree to disagree, or bow out of the conversation. There's a lot to be said by simply keeping your mouth shut.
Don't swear
Practice a week ahead of the meeting. Most of us speak like a mix between a sailor and a truck stop waitress. Be respectful and use respectful language. Not doing so is a sure way to get relatives to quickly dislike you.
Help Out
The first thing out of your mouth when you make your way to the dining room or wherever the party is held at should be, "Is there anything I can do?" Their parents will be really impressed that you even asked. Remember that this day is just as stressful for them. If you pitch in to fill cocktail glasses or wash dishes, you will make a major impression.
You may screw it up. Then you have to worry about damage control, which should involve a lot of apologies. However, your hosts will mostly likely be gracious and give you a little leeway. After all, there must be some reason why their kid is with you.
If you follow this advice and use some common sense, you'll do great. Be yourself, but be the best part of yourself. You want a healthy relationship with your significant other's family so your feelings for each other can grow.
Be the first to comment on this story